.:- hakike ga suru kurai anata no kokoro utsukushii no ni -:.

kuroi_ageha @ 2007-03-26T12:26:00

2007-03-26T04:33:51Z

Though parents rant about how their newborn keeps them awake at night and refuses to feed, I encounter no such problems with Kira. He's been an angel these few months and I enjoy taking care of him very much.

Very soon though, I will have to return to work. Though I trust Brooklyn to take good care of our baby, I can't help but feel regret that I will probably end up missing out a lot on Kira's growth.

Edit: I'm a year older already? That's fast.

kuroi_ageha @ 2007-03-14T00:01:00

2007-03-13T12:37:08Z

Happy 24th Birthday to you, Brooklyn.

kuroi_ageha @ 2007-02-14T06:28:00

2007-02-13T22:29:51Z

Welcome home, my beautiful baby boy.

kuroi_ageha @ 2007-01-29T18:02:00

2007-01-29T10:11:41Z

No one ever updates their journals any more. No activity from Rei [though he's very much well and alive in real life], none from Tala, and nothing from Brooklyn. I wonder why I'm even looking through these journals in the first place.

Maybe because I'm so bored. I'm taking my doctor's advice and resting in bed instead of moving around so much when she heard that I've been experiencing some rather frequent contractions lately. Never mind that I'm just a few weeks away from my due date, I don't want to take any chances. I want to make sure that Kira is healthy and all.

Though I do see him during meal time, Brooklyn hardly comes up to my room these days. I miss him.

kuroi_ageha @ 2007-01-15T12:55:00

2007-01-15T05:01:07Z

My whole body's aching and sore. Is that a sign to tell me that I shouldn't be wandering around the house too much these days and should stay in bed to rest? Bah.

God, I feel so big and heavy. I just have about a month to go, according to my doctor. On one hand, I can't wait to hold Kira and get rid of all these aches, sores and everything. On the other, I'm actually reluctant to give birth so soon.

I need to get out. I've spent more than enough time in bed.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-12-31T10:06:00

2006-12-31T02:07:38Z

...

I'm so tired.

Prior to takeover by Black Ariel

2006-11-02T13:14:38Z

You Are A Romantic

You live your life like a fairy tale... or at least you try to.
Living for magical moments, you believe there's only one true love for you.
Love is the most important thing in your life, and you don't take it for granted.
Your perfect match loves to be in love as much as you do!

Are You Romantic or Realistic?

At least he's happy and safe in the arms of the one he truly loves.

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	3.6
Mind:	3.5
Body:	5.5
Spirit:	4.5
Friends/Family:	2.6
Love:	0
Finance:	4.5
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

http://kings-angel.livejournal.com/331.html?thread=2635#t2635
Glancing back at this and thinking back on our past interactions however, I can't help but feel more confused than ever.
Why couldn't he just be truthful to me? What else is there that I don't know about him?

Was this whole thing a lie to begin with...?

Prior to takeover by Black Ariel

2006-10-24T02:44:23Z

Your Depression Level: 96%

You seem to be severely depressed.
You should seek immediate attention from your physician.
Depression can be cured - you just need to take the first step.

Are You Depressed?

You Are 4% Happy

You know that there's more to life than how you've been living it.
Life can be rough at times, but most of your unhappiness is self-inflicted.

How Happy Are You?

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-10-10T09:03:00

2006-10-10T09:05:08Z

I'm going to leave a note outside Brooklyn's room later. It's my wish that he would read it.

After today, I won't expect to see him, or anyone else in the Beyblading world, again.

Take care, Brooklyn.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-10-02T20:57:00

2006-10-02T12:57:51Z

I'm starting to miss him.

His beautiful eyes.

His gentle smile.

His warm and secure hold.

His soft loving voice.

His comforting presence.

Everything.

But he's never coming back.

He's...happy now, at least.

Happy without me, or Kira.

ブルックリンさん, 愛してる。

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-09-28T10:32:00

2006-09-28T02:47:41Z

Why? Why did things have to turn out this way? What did I do wrong? What did I do? What did I not do? What is it that Garland have that I don't? Why did Brooklyn marry me only to have him say that he would rather choose Garland? Why did he claim that he didn't like Garland before? Why did he kiss me? Why did he sleep with me?

Why wouldn't he just say that he was doing all this for his son? Why hasn't he contacted me about signing divorce papers yet?

Is there really such a thing called retribution? Do I really deserve all this after what I've done?

Why are all the flights to Japan fully booked? Why are people working on as though nothing had happened?

Why do I feel like I'm better off dead? Why do I feel that I was never meant to be happy?

Why can't I forget about Brooklyn...?

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-09-25T21:41:00

2006-09-25T13:41:35Z

I remember hearing a little tale.

About red strings on little fingers and Destiny.

On your pinky, a red string is tied to it and that red string links you to your soul mate.

No matter how far you are from your soul mate, the red string keeps you two together.

There's a red string linking Rei and Tala.

There's another one linking Brooklyn and Garland.

I gaze down at my own pinky.

My red string is linked to no one.

I am meant to be alone for all eternity.

To Brooklyn: Take care. Treat Garland well.
To Garland: Thank you for bringing so much joy to Brooklyn. Please take good care of him.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-09-09T14:09:00

2006-09-09T06:11:56Z

Astrology in parenting, anyone? http://astrocenter.astrology.msn.com/msn/ArticleAstrologyHome.aspx?sd=20060822

Ok, wow. Decoding Baby's crying: http://lifestyle.msn.com/FamilyandParenting/BabyandPregnancy/ArticleAB.aspx?cp-documentid=789138

These are useful, I'm gonna keep these guides for future references.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-09-05T19:54:00

2006-09-05T11:58:41Z

Just a short update to let everyone know that I'm still very much alive and kicking.

Before August 26, I was Kaihara King.

Now, I am King Kingston-Kaihara.

Fill in the blanks.

PS: Baby's still very much alive but not so much kicking though. We still haven't decided on what to call him yet.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-08-24T07:49:00

2006-08-23T23:54:02Z

SCREENED FROM JUST ABOUT EVERYONE

Only 2 more days to my "big day".

I'm actually considering hiring a Private Investigator to check on Brooklyn. But I guess I should respect his privacy.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-08-22T20:43:00

2006-08-22T12:44:56Z

My big day is fast approaching.

Yet I feel no joy.

Instead, I feel like crying all the time.

Why?

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-08-21T21:12:00

2006-08-21T13:37:03Z

I don't know why. I don't know how. I don't know what.

But I can feel that I will get hurt soon. I feel that I will get my heart ripped to pieces soon. I feel that I'm going to die soon.

It's scaring me. I don't know if it's the pregnancy or what, but I've been getting really ominous feelings. It's like, my end is approaching or something.

I'm terrified, I just don't know what to do anymore. When I'm alone, I can't help but focus on those feelings.

Of dread.

Of fear.

Of loneliness.

Why is it that Brooklyn returns home later and later? It...is it my fault? What did I do?

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-08-17T18:41:00

2006-08-17T11:26:37Z

...Tyson is incredible. It can be scary how he can be so lacking in other areas when he's so good in beyblading.

Well, he came to ask me about gay sex today. And seemed pretty horrified by my description of the works and everything. He seemed pretty afraid of thrusting into another guy's body, for pretty amusing reasons too.

I brought him to that toy shop next, and lol that look on his face...

I just wonder how he's going to deal with his first time.

I wonder who the poor guy that gets to be at the bottom is.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-08-14T14:01:00

2006-08-14T06:08:22Z

I.

Am having a boy. ♥

But he's so inactive, I rarely feel him even move.

So...any suggestions for names?

And Brooklyn's been returning later and later from his BEGA trainings. After his BEGA trainings, he goes right to bed and is too tired to do anything else.
Funny that his captain would try and increase his training hours. Hadn't Brooklyn told him about K's sessions and me?
Somehow, I'm getting a real bad feeling about all this.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-08-11T10:32:00

2006-08-11T02:46:25Z

I'm so tired, I can barely keep awake. I've even brought out my laptop and am still updating this damn thing. Guess having something to do makes me feel even more tired.

My mood swings still persist though. And lately, I just took out my depression on Rei. He asked me if I'd like to attend pregnancy classes on him. And for some reason, I just got pissed that he got married first. And with each word of our conversation, the more I thought, the more depressed I became.

Urgh. I just went back home after that, and slept my day through.

I didn't feel any better after that. I still don't feel good right now.

I just went on a bit of journal stalking. And I found the journal of the captain of the Other's real team. He's attempting to keep his team separated from others. And I can safely say he's doing a damn good job.

Chichiue and Otousama's settled everything now. I just hope my mood swing doesn't get the better of me on that day. I'm still wondering if I should invite anyone at all.

Well, right now I just want to mangle up anyone who dares step through the door. I wonder who my next victim's going to be.

EDIT: Oooh, I just felt baby move!! *.*

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-08-02T19:14:00

2006-08-02T11:19:27Z

I'm...tired. Really tired. I just want to turn in to bed and sleep and forget about everything.

I haven't seen Brooklyn around, he's busy with his practices.

Keeping too much to myself, I just feel like I might blow up anytime.

Well, the morning sickness has passed on, more or less. But my mood swings are more and more severe each time, so I've been told.

Damn, I'm...tired. Just want to sleep, and stay in bed all day.

I feel like a stranger in my own house. Don't even know how to converse with anyone, don't even know how to approach him.

Tired.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-06-30T18:48:00

2006-06-30T10:48:50Z

I need gratification.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-06-24T07:58:00

2006-06-24T00:14:34Z

-SCREENED FROM EVERYONE EXCEPT BROOKLYN-

That day in your room in the BEGA Quarters.

Was the best day of my life.

Not because I won some rare part.

Not because I triumphed in a Beyblade Tournament.

But because I gave my all to you

And you accepted everything.

Unforgettable

Wonderful

Beyond anything I had ever experienced.

You brought me to the heavens

And we came down together

As lovers.

I could never quite let go

that memory, that feeling of you within me.

Every night I replay that sweet memory

and pine so badly for it

that it hurts.

Please, Brooklyn.

Just one more time?

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-06-19T12:36:00

2006-06-19T04:39:30Z

Some servants seem to think they're so big shot, they're invisible. Fancy talking about ME when I was just right behind them.
I've already sent an e-mail to Chichiue and Otousama to request their removal from the house.

You think I can't hear what you're saying just because I haven't been feeling well? THINK AGAIN.

No one, except Brooklyn, allowed near my room tonight.

And Brooklyn, YOU BETTER NOT PULL A NO SHOW TONIGHT.

EDIT
Nice, K just angered me. I left a nice little present for her on her LJ. I sincerely hope she likes it.

kuroi_ageha @ 2006-06-13T14:22:00

2006-06-13T06:27:44Z

I feel terrible. I've been hurling practically non-stop. K's trying to contact me to get me to train. There's no fucking way she's getting ME to train, who the hell does she think she is!? I don't want to stay for the tournament. All I want to do is sleep. Sleep, and NOT THROW UP DAMN IT. Why is it so difficult to keep food down!?!!?!

I need chocolate.

Chocolate.

SOMEONE FUCKING GET ME SOME CHOCOLATE BEFORE I BLOW THIS PLACE UP.

I want Brooklyn, damnit. ;_;

EDIT:
Brooklyn, Chichiue and Otousama are coming 'home' tomorrow to meet us.

ooc:
Chichiue, Otousama -> both are honorary terms for 'Father'.